I wrote a post a few days ago about unschooling. A couple people took the time to comment, and I took the time to visit a few unschooling websites to learn more about it. Sometimes I read about something that just fascinates me, and this is one of those times.
At school today I sat with children in the various reading groups that I teach, and I thought of the accusations in the article on unschooling that I read. I wondered if those accusations are true: Have we public school teachers truly created a one-size-fits-all world where children are not valued or trusted? Are we shoving kids into classes with people the same age and trying to “make everyone come out the same?” Are we crushing children’s natural curiosity and creativity. Are the children in schools unhappy?
I looked for “crushed” children - for unhappy children. I looked for teachers and situations where children were being forced into a one-size-fits-all mold.Â
I watched the children in my class, and I watched the children in the hallways. I saw a lot of happy children. I saw a lot of laughing children. I saw children who were pleased with their learning and children who were excited to be at school. I saw children interacting with each other and with teachers and parents.Â
In one of my groups, a second grade girl pulled a tooth and was thrilled that I had a little plastic tooth-shaped container to give her to keep the tooth safe until she got home with it. The other children in the group were interested in the process and asked her questions about her tooth as she worked to pull it.  It was a ”learn-able moment.” Tomorrow I plan on reading Trevor’s Wiggly Wobbly Tooth by Lester Laminack to that group because I know that they will enjoy it and will make connections to the story. If I didn’t share the book with them, they’d miss the opportunity to read a funny story about an event similar to what happened today in class.
Other things I observed at school today: I saw a teacher express concern that one child was not wearing a long-sleeve shirt and was shivering. The temperature outside was in the teens. I saw our guidance counselor find several warm shirts to send home with the child. The school had already provided a new coat for that child at the beginning of cold weather.Â
I talked with a couple of teachers who came to me and asked about helping children who were struggling with some aspect of reading. Each conversation was based on that particular child’s needs and interests. Two different children stopped me in the hall to ask if they could come and read with me. The hallways were filled with comfortable places to sit and read. Smiles were the norm everywhere.
I saw children curled up on cushions reading their favorite books, and I saw others drawing pictures. I saw children working together to complete a project.  A group of six first graders was working in the computer lab researching topics of their choice. Â
In other words, there was a lot of nurturing, caring, learning and socializing going on.  Children were obviously valued and trusted.
Of course logistics demanded that some clear-cut rules were followed at school. That’s the way it is in life - not just in school. It has nothing to do with creating cookie-cutter students, but with creating a physically, educationally and emotionally safe environment.
Maybe in years past there was an emphasis on keeping all the kids on the same level and studying the same thing. However, schools aren’t like that anymore. When I think about the articles and blogs on unschooling that I’ve read this week, I realize that their criticism of schooling just doesn’t ring true for what I see and experience everyday - and what I have seen and experienced over the past 25+ years of working in public schools in several different states. My own two children went to public schools, and my granddaughter is in public school.Â
I’m sure there were some kids at my school who didn’t have a particularly wonderful day today. However, I saw nothing to indicate that any child’s spirit was being crushed or stifled in any way.Â
It’s fine with me if people want to unschool their children. However, the thing that puzzles me is this: Why do unschoolers feel the need to vilify schooling in order to justify what they do? Why not simply say, “This is how I want my children to learn.” Period. Not because their children would be CRUSHED in a school or because schools are all about creating cookie-cutter students.  I suspect that unschooling parents might have had a bad experience with school. Perhaps that is what led them to their decision to unschool. Admit that’s the reason, but don’t dismiss the entire schooling experience because of that.
I believe it is interesting to note that the article I posted about earlier in the week stated that most unschooling parents are college graduates. College graduates are the ones who can afford to criticize schooling. I remember RT’s grandfather - an amazing man who was never able to go beyond grade school because of family obligations. He always told us to “get all the schooling you can because that’s something nobody can ever take away from you.” He was looking at school from the perspective of someone who didn’t have access to it - and he wanted it. He saw the value of it.
Sure, there are some bad schools and bad teachers. But do we throw out all the wonderful and positive aspects of schooling just because some aspects are not good. Why not address the real issues in schooling rather than give up on it entirely.
Sphere: Related Content
February 6th, 2007 at 5:09 am
I thoroughtly enjoyed your post! It was well-written and I agree whole-heartedly. I’ve worked in schools for 20 years. As a whole, schools are loving, nurturing places that focus on the needs of each individual child. I especially like the change in terminology over the last few years that helps us focus on what each individual child LEARNS rather than on what we TEACH. It’s definitely a child-focused environment.
TMS: Thanks, Lyn. I think the terminology is important. The emphasis is on learning rather than teaching - and on what children need rather than how they’re “disabled.”
February 7th, 2007 at 1:57 pm
February 7th, 2007 at 6:11 pm
Hi again Carol,
You have an interesting perspective. I would love to meet you for coffee sometime
I wanted to point out a couple of things. I first wanted to say that not all unschoolers vilify school. And unschoolers don’t hold a monopoly on negative attitudes towards the public school system. Even many teachers and students currently in the system have issue with the “cookie cutter” approach that you mention. It’s not like unschoolers/homeschoolers are saying something new.
Also, you’re right about unschoolers often having negative experiences at school. But they aren’t the only ones. Many homeschoolers, who aren’t unschoolers, had negative experiences. And many families who choose to use private schools or even public schools have had bad experience in school themselves.
Many unschoolers/homeschoolers didn’t have bad experiences themselves, but their children did.
And many unschoolers come into because that’s what works. And realize that they, personally, are a lot more relaxed and happy with that educational philosophy.
So you, can’t really make blanket statements about any groups of educators or parents. Well, you can, but it’s not accurate
I really “liked” school too - or at least I thought I did at the time. And looking back, it’s probably good that I spent most of my time there because of my family situation. I liked school so much, I got way too many degrees
So, when I see people who complain about school, I can see where they are coming from. But I can also see where someone who likes the idea of school and the practice of school is coming from too.
It’s all a big debate, and nobody’s right. So, I listen to what both sides have to say, and try to see their point of view. And make the best decisions I can. I think that’s what most people do, and most people are doing what’s best for their families, or at least trying to. And sometimes, I have to admit there are some unschoolers that really p*ss me off. But there are also some “classical” homeschoolers, and some “eclectic” homeschoolers, and some private schoolers, and some public schoolers (phew!) that do too!
I try hard not to use these people as a universal ruler on how to judge a group. It’s their individual makeup that makes them who they are, not the fact they are unschoolers, or anything else.
Anyway, I have obviously belabored this point way too far. But, I think that being “in the middle” is truly the best place to be, because it’s easier to see that nobody’s right and nothing’s perfect - except from an individual perspective.
Thanks for blogging about this!
February 7th, 2007 at 10:51 pm
I’m a former secondary ed teacher. Unschooling might be one way to describe our lives without school.
As far as deschooling goes, I “deschool†(and I’m not crazy about that word or the label “unschoolerâ€) mindsets that keep me from seeing possibilities when it comes to how, when and what my children learn. For example, both of my children are learning to read at the same time. One is age 6 (K) and the other age 9 (3rd). Both are now reading high 1st or 2nd grade level at this point and progressing nicely. My six year old was ready when he was ready, and my 9 year old was ready when she was ready. To hold back (possibly by teaching with an inappropriate method, when the mind wants to speed forward in a different direction, or from being taught to the middle) or force forward was not the experience that I wanted them to have regarding reading. They are happy readers and feel good about their experience as readers. They are not learning by the use of any program. They do not want to, and the way I see “whole language†working in their lives, I’m fine with that. (I was trained in whole language and phonics instruction when working on a Masters in Reading Instruction). They are learning to read by being read to and by using language via computer games, email, IM, and play. They are learning to read while I type their submissions to our local homeschool magazine and while I read their writings back to them ~ although lately, they are reading them more and more themselves. They are learning to read differently. Sound scary? It did to me. It still does at times when I compare my children to the “school model.†I “deschool†in order to move past one mindset into another possibility for my children. (For example, the ability to learn is not affected by “late†reading. “Late†reading does not necessarily mean a LD.)
I worked in a public school setting. I’ve seen the gamut of experiences in PS. I’ve seen happy children and teachers (kind and caring), and I’ve seen very unhappy children and teachers (kind and caring, and then some not so). I liked school as a child. I was successful. My brother had a terrible time in school, which failed him miserably. The stigma of that failure, he carried as his own personal burden. I don’t like what his “school†did to him as a child. Didn’t like it as a child myself, and its one reason I became a teacher. I wanted to make a difference. I do get miffed at “the system†at times, and I do not like NCLB one bit. I’m not happy when I hear of abusive teachers and inflexible administrators. I witnessed one teacher push and push a child to the point of harassment. I’ve witnessed teachers who lectured notes to middle schoolers and then gave them a test… repeat, over and over again. I’ve witnessed children try so hard and “fail†when in a year or given a different, more relevant topic or way to learn they could have been “successful.†These things concern me. Inflexibility, where it exists, concerns me. The idea of being compelled as a parent to follow “school standards†regardless of a potential negative impact on my children concerns me.
I am glad that we have choices. I’m glad that I can “unschool†my children, who love their lives and loving learning. I am grateful that they have the opportunity to splurge into topics of interest and spend weeks on them or more. I’m grateful we can learn whatever we want to learn whenever we want to learn it. I’m glad my children can learn in their own time and way without fear or worry of measuring up. I’m grateful that we can meet life’s challenges in a cooperative way. I’m glad school is available for those who want and need it. I’m glad to hear of your experience in your school. I was told by a Kindergarten teacher where I registered my daughter for school (and backed out) that K would not be nurturing and that there would be little to no one-on-one. This is in a well respected school district.
I don’t intend to send my children to school unless they want to go. I’m not giving up on the school system, either. That’s my chosen career. I see the good. And if I went back, I would go back with different eyes, though. I would have little patience for NCLB (if it’s still around), standardized curriculum and methods of evaluation, for example.
February 7th, 2007 at 11:27 pm
Can I join you and Tammy for that coffee??
For me the decision to unschool was not in reaction to a bad school experience. I loved school and did well. In fact when making the decision to homeschool, I had to come to terms that there *were* things that my kids would miss out on (and not just “bad” things!). But there are also things that my kids get to experience that school kids miss out on. One is not “right” and the other “wrong”, they are just different. I also have a post over at Life Without School on this subject too!
Do Homeschooled Kids Miss Out?
http://lifewithoutschool.typepad.com/lifewithoutschool/2007/01/do_homeschooled.html
I do think that there are a lot of neat things that go on at many schools. But I still think that homeschooling is best for my kids and it is something that we really enjoy. My oldest was a “late” reader (did not start until around
. I am glad that he was home so that he did not feel pressure to read before he was ready (once it clicked it totally took off, he really did need the time). He also tends to learn things in very non-traditional ways and by being home I can find him the resources that he needs. It is a flexibility that you just can’t get in school…there is no way that a school can custom pick a curriculum that matches the learning styles of every child in the class.
Now, this does not mean that kids can’t or don’t learn in school! Of course they do! I did. And I really enjoyed school and got a lot out of it.
I have many friends whose kids are in public school and their kids are doing fine. I also have many homeschool friends who pulled their kids out of school because their kids were *not* doing fine.
I agree with you that school is not evil. And homeschooling is not for everyone. But it is working great for us and that is all that I can ask for.
Thanks for your thoughtful conversation. I have enjoyed it!
February 10th, 2007 at 6:55 am
This is such an interesting debate with so many thoughts on all sides. I have to admit that my school experience was not positive. My husband and I were both completely unchallenged in high school,a and I hated going to school as a child. Now as an adult with the experiences that I’ve had and the things that I’ve read, I have honestly come to the conclusion that the school system cannot meet the needs of all children. I also believe that school is not necessary and should not be compulsive.
And while I agree that for a lot of kids, the schools are a blessing, I am feeling that it is just not honest to say that the system is healthy. It is a system that was originally designed to train workers, and the coercive, curriculum driven environment is no longer beneficial to our economy (or our bodies, minds and spirits either, for that matter). This is what I believe, so I guess we will just agree to disagree on that point. However, please try reading some of the big unschool thinkers: John Taylor Gatto and John Holt. Maybe you won’t change your mind about school, but at least maybe you won’t be so baffled. Life without school is filled with joy and natural rhythms.
I think one of the differences here is that this dialogue on your blog is mostly talking specific case studies, specific scenes and specific people. I tend to approach the subject of schooling in the US from a social science perspective in addition to my own personal bias. I said this before, and I’ll repeat it, that important thinkers in every field of environmental and human sciences are all encouraging a radical change in the way that we live our lives. It is simplistic to write this movement off as just a group of people who had a bad experience with school. It is about something much larger and much better than that.
The idea of not needing school is indeed radical, but it is the right way to go for our family. I wouldn’t live any other way.
TMS: Thanks for commenting. I don’t think formal schooling in general is as bad as many unschoolers and home schoolers believe. I also realize that how we view schooling is largely based on our own personal experiences with it. I have been fortunate to have mostly positive school experiences. However, I also know that there are some serious problems with public schools. To be honest, if my children were school age now, I would seriously consider homeschooling them. I see so many silly requirements that take away a lot of the joy of learning. Kids are tested to death - and even when teachers realize that the testing is crazy, they have to do it.
My question for unschoolers was about the lack of guidance for children. However, it seems that the article I initially read about unschooling wasn’t completely accurate - or at least it didn’t present a balanced picture of unschooling. Unschoolers who have commented to this post and the other post I wrote on unschooling have stressed that unschooled children are not left totally on their own. Parents offer guidance when needed. So we really aren’t that far apart in our beliefs at all.
May 19th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
I think it is helpful when people focus on the positive and on what they have in common, rather than “knocking” each other. We had some very positive experiences and some very negative experiences while our children were in the public school. However, when we discovered that neither of our children were truly having their needs met, one due to learning “differences” including late reading, and the other testing into the “gifted” program in first grade, but there was no program available until 3rd grade AND “We don’t accelerate our students” was the response to moving him into a higher grade for reading/math. So to best meet their needs we started homeschooling, and discovered that we loved it, they loved it, and we have continued until we have graduated 3 of our kids and our youngest, now 16, will graduate from “homeschool” next spring. We have enrolled our kids in public school classes some, and we have had our kids take college classes (our “gifted” one started college at 14 - part-time while still homeschooling - kind of like dual enrollment) . . . the bottom line is, we support the public schools in our community, because we are business owners and citizens and the majority of the kids and our future employees will get a public education. But we choose to homeschool because it works well for us and we are satisfied with the results.
Marsha
TMS: Thanks for stopping by, Marsha. If I had school-age kids now, I would be very tempted to homeschool. I don’t think, though, that I could unschool. I’m glad homeschooling has worked out so well for you.
June 11th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Hi,
I came across this by “accident”today. I think you have written a very well-thought our piece based on your experience. I am an unschooler, have homeschooled (correct term legally) for the past 15 years, and we LOVE it! My kids have had the freedom to learn what they want, when they wanted to, as they wanted to, and were not forced to learn things they could care less about, in order to pass some meaningless test so that state legislators would feel good about themselves for making such great “strides” in education.
You may see and experience many “happy” people in school, from the kids to the teachers to the janitors. I am sure if you visited any prison you would find happy people, too. Humans learn to adapt to what they must adapt to. Children are trained from an early age that they “must” go to school in order to “get” an education. This brain-washing by our society makes people feel inferior if they earn their educations on their own (free range educations, also known as unschooling).
I believe there are some people who do do well in a public school setting. I know there are many who do not do well, and for them, school is a prison that must be endured. That is how it was for me from day one of first grade (I never attended kindergarten). I could not wait to escape school and quit in the 10th grade! Yippeee!!!! I was OUT! I was F-R-E-E!!!!!!!
I returned 1 1/2 years later because of pressure from family and some friends. What an eye-opener! Within two months I realized that school was a farce and a joke being played out on the students and their parents. I was not learning anything of real educational value. I was not learning anything I would need in the real world. And I was not learning anything I could not teach myself at home. In fact, I had been self-teaching myself much more thought-provoking and informative material than anything I was supposedly being “taught” in school. I had been out in the “real” world and I knew that there was nothing to be gained by staying in school, except for a loss of my time. School was nothing but a waste of my time. Before the end of that school year (the following March), I quit again and I have never looked back. That was over 30 years ago….I have never regretted that decision.
Many people wonder how we can trust kids to learn on their own, and I tell them it is as easy as trusting a baby to learn to walk or talk. You are simply there for the guidance. You can not keep anyone from learning anything that they want to learn! It is an innate need we all have, and we will find a way to learn what we either need or want to know.
Schools should not be compulsory. We live in a supposedly free republic (please say your pledge before you call it a democracy!…”and to the republic, for which it stands,…”), and as a republic, we should not be coerced into compulsory anything. And public schools should be truly public, just like public libraries, where everyone, regardless of age or where they live, can use the facilities and either choose to go or not go, depending on what they want or need. There should not be government oversight (government does not oversee our library experiences or whether or not we even go!)You also cannot call public schools “public” when they do not serve all the public. It is fraudulent to call them “public” schools when they are only deigned for certain age groups and certain demographic areas.
This argument for or against schools is not going to go away anytime soon. I believe in the true freedom of education, regardless of where it comes from, and that it should be freely allowed without compulsion. I also believe that ALL forms of education should be respected, and that when people are given real choices (most people truly do not know they have choices, they merely go with what they have been trained to believe is the only way to go: public schools), then we can all come together as a nation and respect each other’s choices. I do not respect it when people “choose” public education because they think this is the only choice. That is not choice! When people make informed choices based on what is best for their child(ren) and their families, then I am supportive of them in these choices, even if that means they choose public school.
I have eight children. Four of them attended public school all the way through graduation (long story!), and four of my kids were homeschooled/unschooled throughout their entire school years. I can tell you there is a HUGE difference in the way they think, in their leadership skills, and in their self esteem and abilities. The unschooled kids are much more independent and much better critical thinkers than those who came out of public schools. There is such a huge difference that my extended family and friends have noted the differences. I like the end result of our unschooling journey.
My kids who attended public school still want to be spoon-fed information. They have a harder time disseminating ideas. They also are not as apt to look in-depth into things, but allow others to do it for them. The lack of independence is frightening.
I could argue these points all day long as there are dozens of variations and opinions about the different issues you raised, but time will not allow for this. As one who has attended public school, has quit public school and self-taught myself (think Abe Lincoln here!); as onewho had children in public schools, and one who has had unschooled kids, I bring quite a different perspective to this arena, having been on all sides of the proverbial fence. I do, however, enjoy the free discussion and many aspects of this debate. Thank you for your blog, as it has given me time to reflect on my own ideas and experiences.
Lori
June 11th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
TMS: Thanks for your comments, Lori. This is a fascinating topic to me. However, I feel your comparison of school to prison is extreme. LOL!