Archive for September, 2007


A Letter to my 1995 Self

Sunday, September 30th, 2007

I started this post several months ago but never got around to finishing it until now.

Sophisticated Writer had a post entitled A Letter to 1995 Me.  The idea of writing about the wisdom gained from life experience appealed to me.  If I could go back and give my 1995 self some advice, what would it be?  Hindsight is 20/20, and I’ve learned some lessons since 1995.  Here’s what I would tell the 1995 Carol:

Stop obsessing about your weight.  It’s not worth your mental and physical energy.  Accept yourself as you are and set your mind on the important things in life.  Do what you want to.  If you lose weight because you stop obsessing about it, great.  If not, you’re no worse off than before.  And whatever you do, do NOT start taking those stupid diet pills.  They will just mess up your metabolism and wreak havoc on your body.  Sure, you will get a few years of being thinner out of them, but the price will be too much in terms of your long-term health.

Go see a good counselor about the marriage issues.  Now.  Don’t worry about the expense and don’t worry if you have to go by yourself.   It’s not healthy to not talk about things that bother you.  Who knows - maybe if you go to counseling, the marriage might last and you won’t have to go through a divorce.  But even if it doesn’t save the marriage, at least you’ll be saner during the process.

Take dancing lessons.  It’s something you’ve always wanted to do.  So what if you have to go alone.  It’s better to enjoy life by yourself than to have a partner in misery.

Go ahead and finish your dissertation. Now.  Make it a priority rather than spending your energy on something that can’t be fixed right now.  If you put it off too long, it’ll be too late, and all your coursework and qualifying exams will have been for nothing.  You go past the deadline - and the only way to get the doctorate is to start all over again.

Most of all - do NOT marry anyone unless you are in love with him.  He can’t “love you enough for both of you.”  If he drives you nuts before marriage, he will drive you even more nuts afterwards.  (This refers to my very brief second marriage in which I married simply because I knew the guy would always love me and that there wouldn’t be all the drama I experienced in my other two significant relationships - and also because I figured marrying “for love” hadn’t worked out in my first marriage, and the love thing hadn’t worked out with the guy I had dated seriously while I was divorced.  So why not go for someone who would always love me and someone who wouldn’t be a drama-king in the relationship?  I found that a marriage not based on mutual love doesn’t work.)

There really are only a few things I regret in my life - my second marriage,  not finishing my doctorate, and the fact that I still obsess over my weight.  I guess that’s not too bad for 58 years of living.

I think it would be helpful to write to my 2017 self.  What would I want to tell myself in ten years?  That’s an endeavor for another day.

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Snickers-licious Cake

Friday, September 28th, 2007

Our church recently had our annual Fall Festival. Part of the Fall Festival is an auction. Each year one of the ladies of the church bakes a homemade blackberry cobbler that has become almost legendary in our community. At the auction it goes for $500 or more. Last year I contributed a German chocolate cake and a White Chocolate cake to the auction. I don’t recall what they brought - probably around $40 or $50. My cooking isn’t lengendary . . . yet. -)

This year I came up with a semi-original recipe for a Snickers cake. My niece gave me a recipe for a Snickers cake, and that’s where I started with this cake, but I made many changes.  My “Snickers-licious cake” was put in the silent auction part of the Fall Festival, and it brought $50.  Not bad for a newbie.  Here’s the recipe.

Snickers-licious Cake

 “A taste of real Snickers candy bars in every bite” 

1 box German chocolate cake mix

1 12-oz. jar hot fudge ice cream topping

1 12-oz. jar caramel ice cream topping

1 cup peanuts, chopped

1 pound package Snickers candy bars

Mix cake according to directions on box.  Pour ½ of batter into a 9 x 12 cake pan that has been sprayed with Pam, and bake for approx. 10-15 minutes until toothpick comes out clean.

Immediately spread ½ jar of hot fudge topping on top of hot cake (If the hot fudge topping is too thick, heat it in the microwave until it spreads easily). Sprinkle the peanuts evenly on top of the hot fudge topping.  Then drizzle on ½ jar caramel topping.  Pour remaining batter on top of it all and bake until done.  Don’t overcook.

 Spread the remaining ½ jar hot fudge topping on top of warm cake.  Chop the Snickers candy into small pieces and sprinkle evenly over top of cake.  The candy pieces should cover the top of the cake.  Drizzle the remaining caramel topping on top.  Pop the cake back into the still-warm oven for about 30 seconds to semi-melt the candy bar pieces into the other toppings.

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A conversation between Sweet Stuff and PawPaw

Friday, September 28th, 2007

Sweet Stuff and PawPaw are walking around outside the new house.  PawPaw belches.  Sweet Stuff looks up at him - shocked.

“Say ‘excuse me,’ PawPaw,” she chides.

“Excuse me,” replies PawPaw.

“Thank you.”

They continue their walk.

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Online again - and giddy with delight

Friday, September 28th, 2007

I finally went to Target, bought a $5.99 telephone cord, came home, unhooked the useless DSL crap, used the telephone cord to join the computer to the phone outlet, logged onto AOL - had to change my free bring-your-own DSL connection plan to a $9.95 per month dial-up plan  . . .  and VOILA! I am online again.  I had forgotten just how SLOW dial-up is.  So I am VERY slowly online, but I’m online.  Here I am - blogging from home for the first time in almost two months.  It’s incredible. 

I haven’t checked my site meter - so I may be down to only a handful of readers, but at least I can write again.  I’ve sure missed it, and I realize what a satisfying activity writing is.  That is part of what I teach children to do - to write to express their ideas and feelings.  And writing isn’t an activity that has universal acceptance.  I’ve been a little disheartened since I started blogging by the people in my life who feel it’s a waste of time.  They just don’t “get” why anyone would want to blog, and they seem to humor my interest in it.  I no longer care.  I’m just thrilled to be able to do it again.

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Thursday Thirteen - my 69th edition

Wednesday, September 26th, 2007

In looking through my archives, I see that I haven’t done a Thursday Thirteen post in over two months.  Of course, I’ve been without internet access at home for just about that length of time.  So it’s no wonder I haven’t been posting much.  The new internet is set up at the new house, and RT has promised to have one of his tech guys get me set up and running as soon as we move.  We’re at the point of not wanting to do ANYTHING at the old house.

I am writing THIS T13 post from work.  It’s a conference day - no kids at school - it’s my break, and I didn’t even take a lunch break today.  So I think I can take a few minutes for something personal.  At least that’s my rationalization. 

Anyway - here are 13 things that have happened or things I’ve learned or simple items of information since my last Thursday Thirteen post.

1.  We selected the granite for our new house.  The kitchen counters were installed yesterday, and they are gorgeous.  I didn’t ever think I would describe granite as “gorgeous”, but this truly is.  It has swirls of brown and black and grey - bringing out the color in the cherry cabinets and the stainless steel appliances.  It’s “wow!” but classy.  Beautiful!

2.  I had a birthday in August and celebrated 58 years of living.  It is nice to have people still act surprised that I’m old enough to be a grandmother.

3.  I started a new job - well the same job but in a different school.  I am still a reading specialist, but now I’m at the school that my granddaughter attends.

4.  Every morning, I go by my daughter’s home and pick up my first grader granddaughter, Sweet Stuff.  She and I go to school together.  After school, if it’s one of my bus duty days, she sits in my lap and punches the “all call” buttons on the phone so I can call the buses over the intercom.  She has also learned to check off the called buses on the monitoring sheet for me.

5.  This school is bigger than the school where I taught the previous three years - almost twice as big.  Having a bigger school means more responsibilities.  I’m working much harder than before.

6.  Our new house is almost finished.  Seriously!  We will move into it in just a couple weeks.  The flooring folks are there as I type this - putting the first coat of polyurethane on the floors.  They spent Monday and Tuesday sanding the floors. 

7.  The only things left to finish the house are:  Install the garage door (scheduled for Monday), install the shoe molding (after the floors are finished), install inside door knobs, door stops, toilet paper holders and towel racks, install carpet in four upstairs rooms, complete the final plumbing and electrical work, and complete the final drywall and painting touch-ups.  That’s basically it.

8.  We broke ground on the new house in mid-December last year.  So from start to finish, this house took 10 months to build.  It took several months longer than we had hoped, but from talking to other builders, we understand that actually we got it completed in good time.

9.  I will be one very happy person when we are moved and I don’t ever (knock on wood) have to think of moving again.

10.  Experience is a great teacher.  I’m pleased with how well I am adjusting to the new school.

11.  We had a mouse experience recently.  RT and I were awakened in the middle of the night to the sounds of mice munching on paper in his chest of drawers!  Thanks God it was HIS chest of drawers.  I guess God thought I needed a little humbling, and so the next night we heard them in the bedside stand a few inches from my head.  Needless to say, we immediately took steps to rid the house of the mice.  Words can’t express how much I want to move into the new house and away from that mousey old log cabin!

12.  This morning I drove over to the new house, and as I drove along that long driveway, there was a fawn by the drive.  I rolled down my window, stopped and just looked at it - about 25 feet away from me - a beautiful brown color with light spots - and its ears were so pretty - outlined in darker fur.  After a few seconds, it turned and took a couple bounds away, then stopped and looked back at me.  I drove on to the house so I wouldn’t scare it more.  Later, when I left the house, it was still there by the driveway - and it didn’t move as I drove slowly by.

13.  RT is a sucker for the two grandgirls.  We painted “their room” (our downstairs guest bedroom) pink, and RT picked out a pink and very girly chandelier to put in their room.  They love it.  I couldn’t have imagined RT ever picking out something so frilly and girly.  But when it comes to Sweet Stuff and Sunshine, he’d do anything.

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Blogging via email - does it work? And finishing up the new house

Sunday, September 16th, 2007

I really want to learn how to blog via email.  I THOUGHT I had all the settings right, but I’ve sent email a couple times - and so far neither have been posted.   Our home computer issues are such that it looks like we will probably just wait until we move into our new house to get it worked out.  I miss blogging.  I came to my school for awhile on Sunday afternoon to get some work done for school tomorrow, and I’m taking a blogging break.

My life has changed so much the past 6 weeks - and I can even blog about it.  New school - new responsibilities - picking up my granddaughter every morning and taking her to school with me - taking her home each afternoon.  Lots of things to write about - and no computer at home on which to blog. @&*#&^*!!  I would have loved to write about adjusting to a new school.  Some things are the same - regardless of where one teaches.  Other things are different.

It won’t be long till we move into our new house.  We’ve set fall break weekend - October 12-15 -  to move in.  It’s reasonable, and we shouldn’t have a problem making that date.  Here’s a list of what’s left to do:

Get a garage door installed

Get gutters put on the house

Get the hardwood floors sanded and two coats of finish on them (scheduled for this coming week)

Finish the plumbing (has to wait for floors to be finished and for the granite counter tops to be completed)

Have the shower glass installed (all the tile is already done and the glass company has already been out to measure for it.  I think they have a two-week turn-around.  So that’s less than two weeks away from being done.

Finish the heating and air - just putting in the final vents covers.  The a/c has been working for about a month now - and it’s wonderful.

Touch-up walls (a little drywall damage from other work being done - and some touch-up painting)

Get the granite counter tops installed (the granite has been selected, and the fabrication company has been out to measure and make templates.  So it’s now just a wait for them to bring the new counters out and install them)

Buy/install interior door knobs

Finish kitchen/family room cabinets (got to wait for floor to be done before finishing them)

Buy/install towel racks and toilet paper holders

Buy/install carpet in four upstairs rooms.

All the light fixtures except one are in.  All the tile is done.  All the painting is done (except for the final coat).  We have two working toilets, two working tubs, and one working shower.  The oven and microwave have been installed and work.  We had hoped that we would finish the house in 7-8 months.  It will end up being about 10 months from the time we broke ground and started the foundation to when we move in - if we move in mid-October.  However, it’s been a great process.  It’ll be so nice, though, not to drive between the two houses all the time.

IF two other posts about blogging via email happen to pop up, you’ll know that I finally got the email thing to work.

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High School Musical on ice

Friday, September 14th, 2007

Tomorrow we will take Sweet Stuff and Sunshine to see High School Musical on ice. I don’t know how the show will be, but I know I’ll enjoy the company.

This is another Treo created post (later corrected via computer)  LOL!

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The toilets are in and working!

Tuesday, September 11th, 2007

Three of the five toilets in the new house were installed today - and they’re working too. Yea!  No more having to drive to the “old” house or make use of the surrounding woods when I’m working at the new house and nature comes calling. 

I started this post on my Treo - and I just edited and finished it from the computer at work.  The “write post” box doesn’t show up on the Treo - and so I have to write “blind” - having no idea what is actually showing up until I publish it and then look at it.  Oh well… I’ll sure be glad when the internet at home is working again.

I put my Treo on a number that no one knows - and I’ll just use it for data - calendar, email, etc.  I got a tiny phone to use for phone calls. The Treo was just too big and it was too easy to accidentally hit keys and unknowingly call people.  So this way, I can use the Treo to access the internet, do a little emailing and texting, but for phone calls, I can use my tiny cell phone.

 The house is looking spectacular.  Pictures will follow as soon as internet is up at home.

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In Memory of First Officer Thomas McGuinness

Monday, September 10th, 2007

Reposted from last year’s 2996 tribute.

I have the honor of paying tribute to Tom McGuinness who was First Officer on American Airlines Flight 11 - scheduled to fly from Boston to Los Angeles. Soon after take-off, the hijackers commandeered the plane and flew Flight 11 into the North Tower of the World Trade Center. But this isn’t about 9-11, the hijackers, or any of that. This is about Tom McGuinness - a Christian, a husband, a father, a friend, and so much more.

The first thing you notice when you look at a photo of Tom McGuinness is how strikingly handsome he was.

Tom McGuinness

From The Syracuse Post Standard, comes this:

Two days before his senior prom, Tom F. McGuinness made a life-altering choice: he asked a young woman named Cheryl to be his date. It didn’t give her a lot of time to prepare, but she agreed. “I got a dress and we went to the prom, and we stayed together ever since,” Cheryl McGuinness said recently.

But then Mr. McGuinness, 42, was big on life-altering decisions. About a year and a half ago, he and his wife and children, Jennifer, 16, and Tommy, 14, decided to move back east, to Portsmouth, N.H., from California, in part so Mr. McGuinness could pursue better opportunities with American Airlines. He was the co-pilot on American Airlines Flight 11, which struck the north tower of the World Trade Center.

More significant, his wife said, was a decision he made eight years ago, while they were attending a small Bible study group. Mr. McGuinness had always been a religious man — the family attends a nondenominational Christian church — but hearing others talk about their relationship with God gave Mr. McGuinness a new perspective, and he found his faith intensifying.

That realization prompted a change in him, said his wife. “Our family strengthened, his relationship with the kids strengthened, our marriage strengthened. The way we showed love to one another deepened,” she said. “It was the biggest blessing that I could have received.”

Tom and Cheryl

Not only was Tom a Christian, but he allowed his Christianity to strengthen and deepen his relationships with his family and friends.
On one memorial site, a friend of Tom’s wrote:

It has taken me a while to quantify my feelings surrounding Tom’s loss. I was lucky to know Tom in college … we were on the swim team together, took some of the same classes, and lived in the same dorm. He was probably the single most important influencer in my decision to join the Navy. He was a good friend and great mentor. I miss him, his laugh and his goodness.
I have read through the nice postings that have been written on his behalf. If I didn’t know him personally, I would not believe anyone could be that determined for excellence while being kind and considerate. He was truly a remarkable person who strived to find the good in everything he accomplished. I was so lucky to have known him. I am better for the experience and many people that I have influenced are better because of the lessons he taught me. Tom helped get me through some of my life’s toughest times and will always have a special place in my heart … the sadness replaced when I recall his smile and infectious laugh.
John Allen (Marlboro, MA )

A few years after 9-11, a young woman named Jill Smith was asked by a teacher to create a collage about a devastating time in our history. Here is what she wrote on one of Tom’s memorial sites:

As an assignment for our Senior Institute class, we are to create a collage about a devastating time in our history. My partner and I wanted to create a collage about 9/11 and the World Trade Center, but after visiting this site I don’t think we can do that. The images here go way deeper than the images we found of the actual burning building. These people were inside the attacks…you don’t see that through the photos of the WTC covered in smoke or the rubble of remains from the planes. Here, nearly four years later, we still feel it. May God bless this man’s family, and as a 17 yr old daughter who adores her own father, my heart goes out towards his children!!

Tom’s parents, Tom and Edie, also wrote on his memorial page:

We are Tom’s parents, and we want to thank you all for your prayers, love and support. Tom was a wonderful husband, father and son. He cared deeply for family, friends and anyone he met. His sense of humor was special. Your notes have helped us, and we will put them in his memory book.

Tom McGuinness

.
Tom’s wife, Cheryl, writes about him on her web page:

When I was 16 I met a young man and fell in love. As I have said on many occasions, Tom was my high school sweetheart. Our relationship blossomed through high school and college.

Tom and I married soon after I graduated from college, just knowing that we would live happily ever after. Tom progressed in the Navy as a Top Gun fighter pilot flying F14’s and I advanced in my own career. We were blessed with two wonderful children and it just got better and better.

Tom and I were Bible study leaders. Our family had much joy, peace and contentment and it flowed into all parts of our lives. Everything was fine. I was a normal woman living a very happy life. I never pictured that our dream would suddenly become a nightmare. I never imagined that our peaceful life would be completely shattered.

On September 11th, Tom gave me a kiss goodbye and left for work. Little did I know that I would never see him again. He was to pilot American Airlines Flight 11 from Boston to Los Angeles that day.

As the horror of that day unfolded, I quickly realized that I needed God more than ever before. I was devastated - searching for answers that didn’t exist - terrified at the prospect that Tom would not be coming home.

As I have spoken with people around the country I have come to realize that while my tragedy was in many ways unique to me, many of the feelings - the hurt, the loss, the anger, concern for my family - are shared by so many others. In fact, I dare say that all of us will, unfortunately, at some time in our lives experience what I call time in the pit - that time when you feel absolutely lost, alone, afraid and devastated. It may result from the loss of a loved one, divorce, issues with children, career problems or any of the hundreds of other life issues that we all deal with.

What do we do with the pain that results from tragedies in our lives? How do we move beyond them? I have learned how to hope again. Drawing daily from the foundation of faith that Tom and I held together, I have found my footing; He has rebuilt my life.

We have all been impacted by September 11th. Security, peace, safety - things we all took for granted - become casualties of that infamous day. Every life endures saddness and loss. But my story is that no matter what you have experienced or what pain you have suffered, God can bring you through the ashes of destruction to the beauty of life.

Tom’s two children are practically grown. According to The Boston Globe his daughter is studying cosmetology, and his son is studying to be a pilot like his dad.
Tom left a final legacy for his family. Just a few weeks before his death, he and Cheryl had dinner in Boston to celebrate their 18th anniversary. From The Portsmouth Herald:

Over dinner at Legal Seafood, Tom McGuinness shared some horrifying news.

A good friend was in a coma and his wife killed instantly in a car accident. Cheryl McGuinness said she told her husband she couldn’t dream of living without him. She asked him if he thought she was strong enough to endure the intense pain of such a loss.

“‘No you’re not, but God is strong enough. Trust God and he would get you through it,’” McGuinness recalled her husband saying. “He said, ‘Trust God with your life and stay strong in your faith.’ And that’s what I do.”

Later, Cheryl and her two children, Jennifer and Tommy, remember their last night with Tom

. . .The night before he died in the Sept. 11 crash at the World Trade Center, they spent the evening celebrating his 42nd birthday. It was a beautiful celebration. After Tom returned home from a two-day trip, the family shared a special birthday dinner, complete with cake and presents.

“Jen gave Tom a love certificate for the two of them to go out to an Italian restaurant. Tommy’s gift was to spend time with Tom working in the back yard for a day cleaning up the woods and chopping down a couple of trees,” she said. “I thank God for not telling me what was coming in the hours ahead. If I knew, I would have spent our last hours pleading with God not to call Tom home. Our last night would have been very different.” . . . .
She said her husband actually helped prepare all of them for such a loss. By sharing his faith in Jesus Christ with his family, the Massachusetts native gave them a gift — an understanding of the circle of life.

Tom’s legacy to his family is summed up with this quote from The Portsmouth Herald:

One night Tommy tried to comfort his mother as she cried. Instead, the 14-year-old amazed her with his breadth of knowledge.

“Tommy put his arm around me, gave me a hug and said, ‘Mom, everything will be all right. Our life on Earth is so short. Our life in heaven with Dad is for eternity.’ He then went on to say, ‘Dad described eternity this way to me: If you emptied out all the oceans in the world one drop at a time, this would only be the beginning of eternity.’”

Links to tributes to other 9-11 victims can be found at 2996.
The Cotillion is also highlighting the tributes.

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Kate McCann is Suspect in the Case of Missing Child Madeleine McCann

Friday, September 7th, 2007

Madeleine McCannThe McCanns, their family and friends say the accusation that Kate McCann, would have had anything at all to do with the disappearance of her daughter. The Portugese police, however, are interviewing her as a suspect and her husband, Gerry McCann as a witness. All other leads have lead to nothing.

The McCann lawyer expects Kate McCann to be charged with the accidental death of her daughter. We still don’t know what kind of evidence they have. However, the police state accusations would not be made without credible evidence.

The crowd outside the police station jeered Kate McCann as she left the police station after questioning earlier today. Apparently, rumors have been swirling over the past week or two that she was going to be charged in the murder.

What do you think? Do you think there is reason to suspect the mother in this case?

You can see videos of the current news reports at Blue Star Chronicles (because I can’t seem to get videos to post here!).

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