The Median Sib

I’ve seen this via email a couple of times, and it is helpful to read occasionally.  It helps me re-focus on the important things in life.  I hope you get something out of it.

Live a life that matters Ready or not, someday it will all come to an end.  There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.  All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.  Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance. 

Ready or not, someday it will all come to an end.  There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.  All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.  Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance. It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed. Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.  So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire.

The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.  It won’t matter where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived at the end.

It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter?

How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built; not what you got, but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion,
courage or sacrifice that enriched, empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence, but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.

What will matter is not your memories, but the memories that live in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.
It’s not a matter of circumstance, but of choice.

Vow to live a life that matters.

~Author Unknown~

As usual, I walked into the gym this morning for bus duty. My fellow bus duty monitor met me with the following words:

“Only 38 days!”

I immediately knew what she was talking about, and I’m sure that anyone who reads this and is even remotely connected to a school also knows what she meant. There are only THIRTY-EIGHT school days left before summer vacation! That’s a news item worthy of a poem. So here goes:

The Countdown Begins

Joy! There are only thirty-eight days of school left!

Panic! There are only thirty-eight days of school left -

To rise at five as day is dawning

To sit in meetings without yawning

To race to the gym for morning duty

To teach children that reading is beauty

To test, assess, instruct, inspire

To coach, to cheer, to light their fire

To comfort, listen, encourage and chide

To drill, enlighten, inform and guide

To get them ready for next year’s grade

And hope by August their zeal won’t fade

Thirty-eight days of bustling and running

Come day thirty-nine, I’m at the beach sunning!

 

Let me know where to pick up my poetry award.

(Note: This post was selected as part of this week’s Carnival of Education.  Please click the link to find much more to read in the realm of education.)

Wednesday night note:  THEY VOTED OFF MANDISA!  I can’t believe it!  They kept awful singers like Elliot and Ace and Bucky — and got rid of a truly great singer. The voting has nothing to do with talent, and just has to do with popularity - as we’ve known all along.  Sigh! 

It sounds like a fun thing to do. So I’m going to live-blog “American Idol” tonight. Check here starting 7:00 central daylight time.

(7:00 p.m.) Here we go. The top 9 contestants are set to sing. Ryan Seacrest introduces the show. Then the usual music and graphics and cheering.

Oh, look at Ryan — a little facial hair has grown since last week! It looks fairly nice on him. A little scruffy, but good.

The week’s theme is country - with Kenny Rogers as an advisor to the contestants. Now they’re giving the Kenny Rogers’ bio.

(7:03) Taylor is up first. He’s singing “Country Roads” - an old John Denver song (I think). He’s toning down the jerky movements this week. It’s okay. He looks a little uncomfortable.

Randy: “For me, dude, it’s a pretty good choice for you. The vocals were just all right. . . Didn’t see you exude any of your personality.”

Paula: “The song choice just didn’t allow you to shine…”

Simon: “I thought it was safe, boring, lazy… It sounded like you’ve chosen that song ten seconds ago - no rehearsal. . . “

(7:11) Mandisa is next. She’s my personal favorite. She’s singing a Shania Twain song - “Any Man of Mine.” She’s got the attitude to carry off that song. Kenny Rogers said she had chosen a song that had more words than all the songs he’s ever recorded put together. Okay, she’s good - but not fantastic.

Randy - “. . . weird song choice for me . . . at the end you got it together.”

Paula - “You could sing the phone book, the encyclopedia . . . ”

Simon - “I thought that song was horrible. . . ” Lots of boos… “Why do I get booed for being constructive?”

(7:16) Elliot is up next. Ryan described him as the “soul singer.” Hmmmm. His song is “If Tomorrow Never Comes” - a Garth Brooks song. His voice is kinda weak. I just don’t like Elliot.

Randy - “Right now I’m sitting here thinking I love this song . . . but Dude, finally tonight the competition is starting. . . that was hot!”

Paula - “There are so many things I adore about you, Elliot. You are such a breath of fresh air . . . I think you’re fantastic.”

Simon - “Elliot, I thought it was a good song choice. I thought it was safe, a bit hesitant, like you were a bit nervous. . . . it was the best so far, but you’re going to have to do better than that in the future.”

Well, what do I know? I thought it was awful. Every week the judges rave about Elliot, and I just don’t see it!!!

Paris and Ace will be up after the commercial break.

(7:25) Now it’s Paris’ turn. Cute outfit - definitely a little bit country. She’s singing “How Do I Live?” - a good old Trisha Yearwood and Leann Rimes song. Her voice is a little quavery at the beginning, but is getting stronger with each word. I think this is the best performance so far tonight. She’s had a few questionable (pitchy?) notes. I really liked it!

Randy - “I could tell this is one of the toughest songs you’ve sung. . . The front part of it was not good, but you got it together. For me it was just all right.”

Paula - “I didn’t feel like you connected with the song . . . .”

Simon - “Paris, I have to disagree with Paula.” (Cheers!) “I thought it was very good. I thought it was an excellent choice of song. It reminded me of an early Dionne Warwick.”

I generally agree with Simon on the basics, and this is definitely true in this case. Randy and Paul just fawn all over Elliot and then criticize Paris. Unbelievable!

(7:29) Ace is up. Ah - a slow one. His voice sounds a little weak, though. “Tonight I Want to Cry” is the song - a current Keith Urban (I think) song. I would say it could put you to sleep to listen to it.

Randy - “Once again, these are hard songs to bring your own personality to. . . . it was nice but it was really boring to me. . .at least at the end you showed a little falsetto. . .”
Paula - “I totally disagree. . . . I thought it was a contemporary nice take on it.”

Simon - “I think you had a good night tonight. Very good.”

(7:37) Kellie’s up now. She’s a country singer. So she SHOULD do well. Ryan is talking about her naivete “act” - so she’s talking about how it is real and not fake. She’s singing “Fancy” - a Reba McIntyre song. She’s owning this song. I think she’s doing a great job. It’ll be interesting to see what the judges say.

Randy - “Yo. Finally . . . I thought it was great. Your element. . . This is your night.”

Paula - “It was a song you could sink your teeth into. . .”

Simon - “I hate the song personally, but I thought your performance was good.”

Whew! Finally I agree with the judges on a performance. I hate the song, too, but Kellie did a good job with it. I really liked her outfit. (Now THAT sounds like something Paula would say).

Chris and Katherine will be up after the commerical break.

(7:44) Chris is up. A slow song . . . Yawn!! He’s not putting any emotion into it. He’s singing “Memories of Us” - can’t remember who sang it. He’s got a good voice, but this song is a dud. However, the judges adore him, so I’m sure they’ll continue with that.

Randy - “I actually really enjoyed it, man. . . ”

Paula - “You show versatility and still stay true to who you are.”

Simon - “It was great to see a different side of you . . . having said that, for two weeks now the contestants have chosen really boring songs. . . “

Yea! At least Simon is on the same wavelength as I am. I just don’t see Chris’ appeal.

(7:47) Katherine’s turn. I don’t know this song…and I can’t understand the words well enough to figure it out. Okay - it’s “Bringing out the Elvis in Me.” I’ve never even heard of this song before. I like Katherine’s singing, though, and I think she’s doing a good job. She’s keeping my interest anyway! A couple of the others just about put me to sleep. Katherine has a very natural stage presence.

Randy - “Kind of a bluesy country. Very nice. . . ”

Paula - “That’s your style. That’s your niche. . . ”

Simon - “I don’t know what to say. That song is just peculiar. . . ” (Katherine interrupts him to say “Simon, you just don’t like country music, and that’s okay.”)

Let’s see. . . who’s left. Oh yes - Bucky.

(7:54) Bucky is singing a song I don’t recognize either. Gee! For a Nashville gal, I haven’t recognized two of the songs tonight. I can’t understand the words. He’s not enunciating the words very well. I hate to say it because I really like Bucky - he’s got such a cute smile and I like his voice - but it sounds like he’s just mumbling the words. “Best I Ever Had” must be the name of the song…. going by the last line - which was nice.

Randy - “Bucky man….it was all right tonight…good song choice for you, I think. . . ”
Paula - “This is your element. . . .”

Simon - “I’m not an expert in this music, but it sounded all right tonight. It was okay.”

That’s it. I think Bucky or Ace will go home tomorrow night. I’d personally send Elliot home, but everyone else seems to think he’s great.

My Tuesday Tantrum is about what will likely happen in the case of Zacarias Moussaoui. Today a federal grand jury found Moussaoui “eligible to be executed.” The news story is here. Afterwards he declared,

“You’ll never get my blood. God curse you all.”

He definitely isn’t winning any non-Muslim friends with his vitriolic outbursts, but sadly, he is probably right. He’ll probably never be executed. The anti-death penalty folks(who, in a baffling inconsistency, are often pro-abortion….i.e. “Save the criminals. Kill the babies.”) will start protesting. The people on the left who are horrified that someone other that George W. Bush might be blamed for something will get busy with their spin.

Moussaoui will become a “victim.” He will be characterized as a poor, misguided and mentally confused Muslim who was desperately trying to martyr himself for Allah by lying about his part in Osama’s 9/11 plans. The racism card will be played extensively. After all, he supposedly experienced racism in France because of his Moroccan heritage. And as we have learned from the MSM, experiencing racism entitles a person to do just about anything with impunity.

The appeals, debates and protests will go on for years, and Moussaoui will be laughing at us behind his scowl.

Others blogging on Moussaoui: The Liberal Wrong Wing, In The Bullpen, Michelle Malkin, Atlas Shrugs, Stop The ACLU,  Sister Toldjah

Tuesday Open Trackbacks

Linked to: Third World County, TMH Bacon Bits, Stuck on Stupid, Rhymes With Right, Adam’s Blog, Is It Just Me,  Blue Star Chronicles, The Real Ugly American, The Liberal Wrong Wing, Uncooperative Blogger, Votes Wagon, Mark My Words, The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, Free Constitution, The Comedian, Jenee, Cigar Intelligence Agency, Random Thoughts of Yet Another Military Member, Mudville Gazette

(Update, 6/12/06 - for new information on the Winkler case, click here) 

People continue to read and debate the post I wrote over a week ago about Mary Winkler’s killing of her husband, a Church of Christ minister. If you want to read that post or others, go here, here, and here. In the comments section, people have argued about what the Church of Christ believes or doesn’t believe and what it practices or doesn’t practice. There are strong and passionate feelings both pro and con. For the most part it has been a civilized discussion. I’ve only had to edit one comment that crossed the line.
After reading all the arguments for the submission of women in the COC and the arguments about why they don’t use instrumental music (which probably has more to do with saving money than with any Biblical misunderstanding since they do a LOT of things in their church and services that are not found in the New Testament), I figured it was time to provide some background for my beliefs.

While I disagree with the COC’s interpretation of the Bible, that doesn’t mean I think they are going to Hell. Of course not. I don’t think as a group they are bad people at all. In my experience attending three different COC churches I met some very fine and sincere Christians. God knows our hearts and our intentions and our actions, and I believe he values those much more than which particular church we attend. It is the basic belief in Christ as the son of God and our Savior that is the key - not these other side issues.
However, I DO believe that such rigid and misguided (in my opinion) doctrine attracts men who will misuse that doctrine to justify their abuse of women and children — just as some Catholic priests have misused their position of authority to abuse children. Only Mary Winkler knows why she killed her husband (as she admitted doing). However, something extreme (abuse, her own mental illness, or something) led her to an action that was supposedly totally out of character.
I grew up in a large parsonage family. My father was a minister, and my mother was active in the women’s groups and raising seven children (of which I’m the middle child). She often taught Sunday School and cooked many meals for covered dish suppers. She still puts together a delicious meal for 30 - 50 people with very little notice and with seemingly little effort.

I’ll back up a little to give more background. My father was called to preach when I was a newborn. The call was so strong that he moved our family to Kentucky in order to attend college and then later moved back to Georgia for graduate school to get his Masters of Divinity degree in order to become an ordained minister.

In 1986 my father died after more than 35 years of preaching. He had served in 3-point circuits, small town churches and large churches. At the time he died he was the minister of a small country church - a church that was typically pastored by retired ministers - which was the case with my father.

His death was unexpected, and the church was left without a pastor. A couple weeks after his death, a group of church members came to my mother and asked her if she would be the pastor until another one could be found. There is no one on earth who more sincerely and humbly seeks to do God’s will than my mother. After much prayer, she accepted. Later when the church members asked her to stay on as their minister, she agreed. While pastoring fulltime at that church, she went back to school, finished her bachelors degree (which she had worked on whenever she had a chance to take a course or two over many previous years) and went to Divinity school to get her Masters of Divinity degree and became an ordained minister - all at a time when most people her age were retiring. She was able to pastor several different churches before mandatory retirement at the age of 70 - churches where even the die-hard “women shouldn’t be preachers” members came to the point of supporting her and seeing God’s grace and will lived out daily in her life. After retirement, she became a minister of visitation at a large local church. Even now, at the age of 83, whenever other ministers calls and asks her to preach for them when they’re sick or planning a trip, she always says yes because of her strong calling.

Last fall she began her own blog - Ruthlace - it was there that she wrote a post about women preachers and the place of women in the church. I will exerpt some of it here (actually a LOT of it), but I recommend that you go and read the entire post. It’s long, but it’s detailed and provides wonderful Biblical documentation for her beliefs and mine.

What About Women Preachers

I kept coming back to the subject of what the Bible has to say about women as preachers. My husband who was a pastor used to tell those who came to him for counsel concerning a call to preach, “If the Lord will let you do anythng else, do it.” Becoming a pastor is a glorious joy and privilege but also a never ending task. The demands are staggering.

 

Last year a man who identified himself as a preacher, wrote a letter [to a local newspaper]. . . stating that women preachers violated the clear teachings of Scripture and were a “cancer” on the church. A clear reading of the Bible in context indicates otherwise. 

 

1. Starting in the Genesis of our Bible, Chapter 1, we read all (men and women) are made in the image of God and both men and women are given dominion over the rest of creation: “Then God said, ‘Let us make man in our own image, after our own likeness; and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the air …’ So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female, He created them.” (Genesis 1:26-27)

 

2. When Jesus said, ‘whosoever will’, He did not give a subordinate list for women. . . . The good news of the Gospel is that Jesus liberated (re-created) both men and women. Many New Testament passages show that it was Christ’s intention to reverse the widespread subjugation of women, which began when the cancer of sin (speaking of cancer) entered the world. (Genesis 3). In Genesis 3, we read that both man and woman lost the joyful liberty God had given them in creation when they abused that freedom in prideful disobedience. Sadly, God’s intention for mutuality and equality among man and woman went awry. Thus, the image of God became distorted with sin and our world became ‘fallen’ (full of sin). Jesus came to save us from sin. (Matthew 1:21). 

3. In a culture that refused to allow women as teachers, learners, or even as witnesses in court, Jesus assures Martha and Mary sitting at His feet that learning was a good thing (Luke 10:41-42). ‘Sitting at the feet’ of a master is a phrase used for a ‘learner’ or ‘disciple’. It is difficult for our generation to understand the amazing freedom (and grace) Christ’s coming brought to the world of women as well as men. In many of Jesus’ parables, when He used male images and activities, He also used a parallel involving women. . . . 

4. Jesus allowed women to be the first witnesses to the resurrection. In fact, it was Jesus Himself who told Mary Magdalene to ‘go and tell’. . . . 

5. Acts 2:17-18: “And it shall come to pass, says God. That I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh. Your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, your young men shall see visions. Your old men shall dream dreams. And on My menservants and My maidservants, I will pour out My spirit in those days. And they shall prophesy.” The prophet Joel’s words that women as well as servants will one day prophesy came true at the Pentecost. A prophet can be a foreteller of future events and/or a person gifted in the exposition of divine truth. Since the coming of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, God has imparted His gifts to each person ‘just as He determines’ (I Corinthians 12:11). We do not tell God to whom He can or cannot give any gift, including the gift of preaching. Pentecost represents God’s sanction for prophetic ministry by women as well as men. It is God who calls a person (whether man or woman) to preach. I would never dare to stand behind a sacred pulpit without being sure of God’s call. 

6. In Galatians 3:22-28 we read: “For we are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus. For as many of you as were baptized into Christ have put on Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:16-28). Paul goes on to say that Christ came to redeem those under the law (Greek, slave, female) that we (all) might receive the full rights of sons (whoever will). The masculine noun (son) and pronoun (he) was used for both genders in the original and so translated into English by Biblical scholars in places when the intent was son/daughter, he/her or children. At other times the gender is specified when read in the original language. 

7. Paul tells us in I Corinthians that a woman is not to pray or prophesy without a ‘head covering’. This certainly means that if a woman dresses decorously, she can both pray and prophesy. (I Corinthians 11:5) Paul goes on to say, “as a woman came from man, so also man is born of woman.” Both genders were loved and honored equally by God in the decisive events of Creation (Genesis 1:26-27), Incarnation (Matthew 1:21) and Pentecost (Acts 2:17-18). 

8. All my life I have heard people quote Paul’s words in I Corinthians 14:34, “let your women keep silent in church.” Some incorrectly used this as a proof text to forbid women to preach or teach. In the context of chapter 14, Paul admonishes the women at Corinth to be quiet, not because it is wrong for women to speak out loud in church service. He has just told them they can pray or prophecy as long as they act and dress circumspectly. (I Corinthians 11:5). Paul goes on to explain that “God is not a God of disorder but of peace … everything should be done decently and in order.” (I Corinthians 14:33-40). So untaught women were not to disrupt the service by asking questions out of order. Better these women should ‘ask their husband’ at home 

9. Ephesians 5:22-24 is one of Paul’s five ‘hupotasso’ passages, (I Corinthians 14:34, Colossians 3:18, I Timothy 2:11, Titus 2:5) so named because of the Greek word translated ’submit’ or ’submission’. A full discussion of male/female roles would require a careful exegesis of all five passages. The idea of submission was nothing new. These women had been taught ’submission’ from their mother’s knee. Submission was a part of Jewish life for women since the tragic event of ‘the Fall’ in Genesis 3. What is new? The new is seen as we read the rest of the story. Men are also taught ‘to submit as to the Lord’. Paul, a little more politically correct than Jesus, was careful not to upset the delicate cultural fabric of his day. But Paul was a ‘new creation in Christ’ since he met Jesus on the Damascus road. Paul recognized that ’submit’ is a good word. So do I. What is new in Paul’s theology is how women are to submit; they are to submit ‘in the Lord’. In fact, Paul requests the same submission of the entire church body at Ephesians. They are all to ’submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.’ (Ephesians 5:21). I Timothy 2:11:12 is another example; “Let a woman learn in silence and submission, in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence.'’ In the context, the Corinthian women were speaking so as to create disorder in the worship. It is often said, ‘women like to talk’. Paul is maintaining that untaught women should be taught (manthaneto is imperative). The silence and ‘full submission’ (again to the church body or teacher) is what any teacher would ask of his pupils. A correct rendering of I Timothy 2:11-12 (of the original into English) would be: “I command that women learn (be taught) in quietness and full submission (to the teaching authority). I am (presently) not permitting a woman to teach and she is not to exert evil influence over a man.” Women (or men) who ‘exert evil influence’ are not to teach. 

10. When we study the whole of Paul’s letters, we realize that the great Apostle Paul was not chauvinistic toward women as some have claimed. It was Paul who referred to Julia as ‘outstanding among the apostles’. It was Paul also who called Phoebe ‘a minister of the church’. Of the 29 people Paul greets in Romans 16, many are women whom he addressed by name, which is contrary to Jewish custom; Phoebe, Tryphosa, Julia, Mary. 

This passage of scripture definitely tells us that the woman Phoebe was a minister. In Romans 16:1, Paul says, “I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a diakomos (translated into English as ’servant’ only for Phoebe) of the church in Cenchrea.” Paul uses the word, diakomos, a masculine term with no article. When Biblical scholars translated the word ‘diakomos’ into English, they translated it ‘deacon’ (3 times) or ‘minister’ (18 times). Only in the case of our sister Phoebe is it translated from the original into English as ’servant’. In fact, in Romans 16:1-2, Paul refers to Phoebe as ‘prostatis pollon’, which if addressed to a man would likely be translated into English as ‘ruler of many’…. 

Post Script: People have asked me what Mama thought of women preachers and what my parents would think of me as a pastor. If I may editorialize, I think that where my parents are now (where the scales of tradition and pre-conceived ideas are removed from their eyes — and where the Bible is understood in the original language and all things are clear) they would know that when Jesus said, “Whosoever will”, he had no subordinate list for women. 

Then we have Jesus Himself telling Mary Magdalene to go and tell the good news of His resurrection to all including the 11 male disciples. Then Jesus telling Martha that Mary had chosen the “good part” of sitting as a disciple at His feet. There are verses in the Bible (and the Bible is our authority) that, if taken independently from other scripture,could make a case both pro and con. I think I have studied them all. That issue would make another whole paper . . . . . 

I remember also Mama relating to me about a Missionary speaker commenting of the Corinthian passage that says, “Let your women keep silent in church …If they would learn, let them ask their husbands at home.” Mama said that the missionary (a very dedicated male Christian missionary doctor) said that in Paul’s day, women (like children) were not educated and sometimes asked questions out loud in church. According to this missionary, the women in his mission field did the same. They might yell out to their husbands, “John, what did he mean?” This missionary said he often felt like Paul at these kinds of interruptions: “keep your women silent, if they would learn anything, let them ask at home — or at least at break time! ” and let everything be done decently and in order.” (I Cor. 14:40.) In other words, the missionary said, this passage did not mean that women had to keep silent. See Galations 3:28, Luke 8:1-3; Acts 2:17-18; and Romans 16:1 for other relevant passages. If women kept silent in church, silent would also mean not teach,speak, sing, testify, preach or even say hello — or whisper “no” to a noisy child. It simply meant to teach your women (as you teach your children) order and manners in private for public behavior so they will not interrupt the meetings. . . . Ordination is certainly not a women’s rights issue. Ordination is not a right to which any of us is entitled. It is an unmerited call and an unexpected gift of the Lord’s mercy. It is not a call to authority but a call to service.

And now I am finished with the topics of Matthew and Mary Winkler, the beliefs of the Church of Christ, and the submission of women. No matter the reasons behind what Mary Winkler did, it is a tragedy and there are three little girls who will live with this for the rest of their lives. Parents have lost a son, children have lost not only their father but their mother as well, a church has lost its minister, a woman is dealing with having killed her husband, and an extended family has been shaken to its foundation.  I will keep them all in my thoughts and prayers.  Perhaps I’ll write about the topic again when the reasons behind the killing are known. 

For first grade I attended Fourth Ward Elementary School in Griffin, Georgia.  My teacher was Mrs. Landrum.  There are two things I remember clearly from that year.  First, I remember that we had reading groups.  When it was time for my reading group, we’d sit at a round table with Mrs. Landrum and read.  I don’t recall doing anything around the table other than taking turns reading.  Mrs. Landrum would put a star sticker on the forehead of each child who read well.  My second memory is of running out to the playground with that star sticker on my forehead and just bursting at the seams with pride and happiness.